Edited by Mikkel Hyldebrandt
For many LGBTQ+ people, the end of the year arrives with a unique combination of exhaustion and expectation. After months of showing up – for community, for political battles, for friends in crisis, for ourselves – December can feel less like a festive runway and more like a crash landing. Activism, advocacy, visibility, and the constant emotional labor of simply existing as a queer person in a charged political climate take their toll. And yet, when the holidays approach, we often push ourselves even harder: to attend every event, to be relentlessly cheerful, and to keep giving more when our energy is already frayed. This season, it’s time to reclaim something radical: rest as a queer right, not a reward.
The Politics of Rest
Rest isn’t just about catching up on sleep—it’s a deeply political act in a world where queer people are expected to be resilient at all times. Many in the LGBTQ+ community carry an unspoken pressure to stay vigilant: to monitor legislation, support others in crisis, and represent our identities proudly even when we’re tired. This perpetual readiness is emotionally draining. Recognizing that we deserve rest is a first step. Giving yourself permission to slow down doesn’t diminish your commitment to the community. In fact, rest restores clarity, compassion, and stamina—qualities every activist needs. You cannot pour from an empty cup, and you certainly cannot change the world from burnout.
Reclaiming Guilt-Free Downtime
Holiday downtime often comes with guilt, especially for high-achieving LGBTQ+ folks who feel responsible for everything around them. Let this be the year you choose relief over responsibility. Try reframing rest as maintenance: something essential, non-negotiable, and deeply nourishing.
A helpful mindset shift: imagine speaking to a friend you adore. Would you ever tell them they’re “not allowed” to slow down after a stressful year? Offer that compassion to yourself. Rest isn’t avoidance—it’s replenishment.
Grounding Practices to Help You Reset
Grounding practices can help re-center you when exhaustion or overwhelm creeps in. These are simple, gentle, and don’t require perfection:
- Five-Minute Breath Check: Place a hand on your chest and another on your belly. Inhale slowly for four counts, exhale for six. Repeat for five minutes. It signals the body that it’s safe to relax.
- Temperature Reset: Hold something warm (tea, a heating pad) or cold (an ice pack) to anchor your senses and interrupt spiraling thoughts.
- Sensory Grounding: Name five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, and one you can taste.
- Micro-Movement Breaks: Stretch, shake out your hands, or take a brief walk—especially useful if stress sits heavy in your body.
These small rituals accumulate, building resilience without demanding extra emotional bandwidth.
Rest Practices That Restore the Queer Spirit
Queer rest can be joyful, creative, sensual, and deeply personal. Consider:
- Digital Quiet Zones: Choose a day or evening without news, political updates, or doomscrolling.
- Queer-Centric Comfort Media: Rewatch your favorite LGBTQ+ films or shows that feel familiar and safe.
- Creative Escape: Doodle, cook, craft, journal—whatever reconnects you to yourself without pressure to produce.
- Community Cocooning: Spend time with people who make you feel affirmed and relaxed, even if it’s low-key.
You are not required to be “on” all the time. Rest does not make you less queer, less committed, or less brave. It makes you whole. And going into a new year with a rested mind and heart might be the most powerful act of resilience you can choose.