I Will Choose ME Each and Every Time

By Jamie Kirk


Researchers studying healthy self-esteem say that ‘some self-love helps to promote mental health and well-being. Researchers have linked self-love to a decrease in sadness, depression, and loneliness, and noted an uptick in well-being, both with their relationship with themselves and with others.’ Having healthy self-esteem also contributes to fewer feelings of anxiety and neuroticism. In another study, researchers linked low self-esteem to higher levels of aggression and anti-social behavior. Here are my thoughts on five reasons it’s time to begin to become more selfish.


Your relationships with others will improve  

As you can see from the world around us, there are universal problems in relationships everywhere. No matter what kind of relationship (e.g., romantic, friendship, family, boss,etc.) so many get destroyed by pain, guilt, or betrayal, and other not so positive emotions.  But, once you start to embody love yourself, you will see a huge transformation and upgrade in all of your relationships.


I know it sounds tree-hugger-ish, but we only perpetuate pain and sorrow in the world because we have not fully healed our wounds.  Once you step past the victim mentality, realize and accept that only you are in charge of your emotions, you can bring whole new energy into your everyday relationships.  Also, it forces you to leave behind those folks that no longer serve you, and attract people who truly inspire and uplift you.


You will learn to truly love the person in the mirror

Most people, unfortunately, look to others for love and acceptance.  We tend to do very little to cultivate these feelings, which could explain why we have some trying times. Most of us seek outside of ourselves to find what we need, and when we don’t get it, we begin to get frantic.  It is overwhelming to think that all we need, we already have in ourselves.


Selfishness doesn’t have to mean only caring about ourselves – it means putting ourselves first and taking care of our needs so that we can offer more value to the world.


You will have better health

Inevitably, when you start to love yourself, you will want to put more loving, wholesome things into your body. You will crave foods that energize you and promote good health, not ones that poison your body, mind, and soul.  Once you cultivate self-love, you will learn to get “selfish” with what you eat and how you treat your body. You will welcome the opportunity to chop up fruits and veggies that contribute to a healthy meal. Exercising will not seem like a chore. You will actually get up and get moving!


When you love yourself, you will need and want your health in tip-top shape, and you will accept nothing less.


You will bring down mental barriers

We tend to feel we can’t control much in our lives because of factors like laws, the economy, the political landscape, money, relationships, our weight, our health, etc. The resulting feeling of helplessness can lead to destructive behaviors and chaos. By putting ourselves first, and trying to remove all of our destructive thought patterns, the world can become a little less burdened.


You will make better decisions that serve you well

Once you have self-love within, you won’t want anything in your life that could potentially get in your path of peace. You will want to remove what no longer serves you, and instead, welcome in the people and things that uplift your spirit. Decision-making will become easier because you will know exactly what you want out of life and will know how to align energetically with those choices.


Bottom line; becoming our best selves requires us to put ourselves first, and by doing this, we can offer more to our fellow man. So don’t hesitate to become a little more selfish. Quit that job that kills your soul, go on that vacation you’ve been dreaming of taking, break off a relationship that doesn’t bring you happiness, and continue to follow your heart.


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