By Branden Lee
WELL MY HOPES OF MIRACULOUSLY finding my first ever boyfriend after only one week in Atlanta were quickly dashed.
Things with EMT were great the first week. We spent nearly every day together. He showed me around the city. He took me to most of the gay bars. We went on dates, went out and danced, cuddled at his place, and watched TV all day, and things seemed perfect.
At the end of our first week together, he even asked if I wanted him to be “my man.” I was elated. I had been waiting my entire life for my first boyfriend, and it was finally happening.
And then it all collapsed.
The day after EMT and I had the boyfriend talk, he acted like he was too drunk to even remember. I was embarrassed to even bring it up. It’s humiliating when someone says something to you that means the world to you, only to have it be an afterthought the next day.
I did bring up the boyfriend subject to EMT, and he decided it was too soon. We did only know each other a week, but if I spend every day with a guy, that should be enough to know if I want to be with him or not.
THE FOLLOWING WEEK, I ONLY saw EMT once. The one night we did spend together, he worked a 13-hour day and still put in the effort to see me, even though he flew out to DC the next morning. Seeing that he put in that effort made me believe everything was fine.
Then the next week, I only saw him once again and things definitely felt off. I thought EMT was just tired from work, but when I brought up the relationship subject again, he completely didn’t want to talk about it.
Two days later, he texts me asking if I have time for him to come see me. Of course I said yes. After I said I needed time to get ready and he said there was no need for me to get dressed up, I knew he was coming to dump me.
I was right. EMT parked outside my building, and I sat on the back of his truck with him. He gets right to it, and tells me he reconnected with his ex and they decided to give their relationship another go.
I was surprised since the only time EMT told me about this ex was when he told me this guy cheated on him.
IT’S NOT THE FIRST TIME A guy dumped me to get back with an ex. It’s practically impossible to compete with an ex. History and feelings are already established. Someone new can’t compete with that. It felt extra humiliating that EMT would rather be with a guy that cheated on him than me. We spent a month together, and apparently it meant nothing to him.
I was also annoyed that EMT acted like he was such a great and stand-up guy for choosing to breakup with me in person instead of via text or on the phone. I asked him why he came to the conclusion that I was expendable, and why getting back with a guy that cheated on him was a better option than me. He couldn’t give me a straight answer about anything. What’s the point of dumping me in person if you can’t clearly state why you’re dumping me?
EMT DECEIVED ME, LED ME ON, and got my hopes up, only to reveal that I wasn’t the one he wanted to be with. I don’t want to view our time together as a waste. He did pay for everything, so I got to see the city, got free drinks, went to most of the gay clubs in town, and went out to nice dinners for free. So it was worth it.
A lot of Atlanta gays I’ve encountered do seem bitter and jaded about the quality of men here. EMT went to great lengths to present himself as the perfect gentleman only to reveal himself as a fuckboy. But I’m still optimistic it’s possible to find a boyfriend in Atlanta