I recently met a guy, and one of the things that was so refreshing about him was that he was free of gender-specific norms and effortlessly dressed across gender stereotypes. But recently, he confided to me that he wanted to transition from male to female – and I am having a hard time with it. I am attracted to him, but I don’t think I can deal with him being her. What do I do?
So, you met a guy that you admire for bending stereotypical gender norms (are you sure they even identify as he/him at this point?), but you struggle with the fact that they want to identify as a trans? It seems you are stuck in some rigid gender norms yourself, so maybe start by educating yourself. First, this person has chosen you as a confidante to what is probably the most significant journey of their life, so please don’t be that person that meets them with prejudice and closed-mindedness. It is totally fair if you need to re-evaluate your emotions and can’t engage in anything romantic right now, but please be a friend and support a person you admire. It is okay to have questions and seek answers, so why don’t you take your friend by the hand and seek those answers with them? Prove yourself to be a true friend and trans ally.