Q
I’m a gay guy in my fifties, and I have an issue with finding sex partners that are compatible with me. More precisely: I’m a bottom, and I can’t seem to find a top! It seems because I’m now ‘of a certain age’ that guys expect me to be this daddy-type lover, who will throw them around dominantly and be the top – which is exactly what I want some hot guy to do to me! Just because I present and look a certain doesn’t mean that I am that way! Damn, ageism is complicated. What can I do?
A
Let’s dial it back a little and look at this problem from a different angle: you’re in your fifties, and even though it may not be as easy to find hookups like it was in your twenties, your options aren’t exactly limited. Especially now when it isn’t just guys in their twenties that are considered hot. So when you say ageism, is it really because guys in their twenties and thirties don’t want to top you, and you don’t want to hook up with guys your own age or older, who want to top you? Sorry for the sneaking suspicion here, but it seems like you are concerned about being put in a certain box when maybe you are putting others in a similar box? There are a lot of guys that are into hot daddies, and many may be bottoms, but not all are – especially if you widen the scope a little and find a hot, topping daddy for yourself.
Do you have a question, query, or conundrum about dating and relationships? Send an email to mikkel@davidatlanta.com.
